


Blast of Happy

by SapphireMusings



Category: Stargate Atlantis
Genre: Don't Ask Don't Tell, Humor, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-22
Updated: 2020-01-22
Packaged: 2021-02-27 12:27:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 618
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22367161
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SapphireMusings/pseuds/SapphireMusings
Summary: “It’s like a blast of happy up my ass!”
Relationships: Rodney McKay/John Sheppard
Comments: 7
Kudos: 49





	Blast of Happy

**Author's Note:**

> Saw an LJ icon. Text on it said: “It’s like a blast of happy up my ass!” Heard McKay, in a morphine haze, mumbling ‘ass’ and then he got all hyper and then Shep was there and, well, verbal slapstick ensued.
> 
> Original Date of Publication: January 24, 2013.

“It’s like a blast of happy up my ass!”

Rodney continued his enthusiastic, hyperactive jumping about the room from one Ancient piece of machinery to the next, completely oblivious to John slowly straightening to stare at him.

Sheppard scrubbed at an ear as if he couldn’t have heard what he thought he heard. Attempting for nonchalant and failing badly, he said, “Blast of happy, McKay?”

“Hmmm? What?” McKay bent down to closely examine another reading.

“Ass, McKay. Your ass.”

 _Crap_ , thought Sheppard, _that didn’t come out right_.

“Yes, yes.” McKay waved an arm in Sheppard’s general direction, his attention still focused on the new find. “I’m an ass. What else is new?”

Sheppard heaved a sigh of relief.

McKay’s brow furrowed. Then he slowly, very slowly, turned to face Sheppard. “You didn’t call me an ass,” he said equally slowly. Then he twisted, comically, to try to see his own ass. “What? Do I have something on it?”

“Yeah, that’s it,” Sheppard said agreeably.

McKay’s gaze narrowed. “You’re acting weird.”

“Me? I’m not the one running around this room like a bunny on speed shouting about blasts of happy up his ass . . .”

_Oops._

McKay’s eyes widened. John watched as a slow flush of red crept up McKay’s face. Then the arms were across the chest in a belligerent fakeout that Sheppard knew better than to buy. “Hmph,” was all Rodney said and then turned back to the machinery, but not before John caught a flash of fear in Rodney’s eyes.

Before his brain could catch up with his mouth, John found himself trying to explain in order to dig McKay out of his own hole that John had somehow fallen into with him.

“It’s just, you know, most guys wouldn’t, well, associate happy with . . . well, with something, um, uptheirass.” The last three words were said so quickly they become one word.

McKay mumbled something at the machine he was hunched over.

“What was that?” asked Sheppard, fervently hoping that McKay would get them out of this.

“I SAID,” McKay all but yelled, before going quiet again, “maybe I like things up my ass.”

“Oh.”

The silence stretched until:

“What kind of things?”

McKay whirled, eyes glittering, hands gesticulating wildly. “Are we really going to do this?”

“Do what?” Sheppard tried to look innocent but that ability was lost to him at the moment and he had this awful feeling that he was looking more lost and embarrassed than anything that could be construed as cool.

“You’re asking.”

“I am.”

“You want me to tell.”

“I guess so.”

“Fine.” The arms were crossed over the chest again, but the eyes were down, staring at the ground. “I like cock, okay? Other men’s cocks.”

“Up your ass.”

“Where else?” Rodney all but snarled.

John shrugged helplessly.

McKay glared.

Sheppard found an interesting speck to rub at on his P-90.

Finally:

“Are we done here?”

“Guess so. I’ll just, uh, check the perimeter.”

“Fine.

“McKay . . .”

_“WHAT?”_

“I get it.”

“Get what?” McKay’s impatience was circling, waiting to pounce.

“The happy. Ass. Up. You know.”

“I could have sworn you knew English a few minutes ago, Colonel.”

Sheppard huffed out his frustration then blurted, “I like having a happy ass too, okay?”

McKay watched him stride from the room. “Huh.” He turned to look at the alluring Ancient discoveries behind him then turned back to the doorway the other discovery had just disappeared through, clearly torn. “Ass,” followed by a glance at the doorway Sheppard had disappeared through. Nobel,” staring at all the new Ancient machinery. He looked down at his groin. “Oh, you just shut up.”

Giving the machinery a sorrowful look, Rodney headed out after Colonel “Happy Ass” Sheppard.

**SGA**


End file.
